Originally posted on January 30, 2006.
I was some kind of ambulance driver or medic. At any rate I was inside an ambulance although it was a kind of stage ambulance because the way the visuals were set up it was as one side of the ambulance was missing, thus allowing me to see inside from afar.
A dead Jennifer Anniston was inside.
Somewhere, somehow she got decapitated. I’m a little vague here, but it might have been me who cut it off.
Anyway there was this discussion between me and my nurse about whether or not you could sew a head back on and keep the patient alive. I said yes, but it had to be done quickly.
I got distracted by something and did not return to dead Jennifer Anniston for a few hours.
When I did return she was covered in some kind of sticky goo, like the gunk that covers sliced ham when it has run past its expiration date. A thin sheet covered her body and I removed it to reveal her chest.
The eyes were open on the decapitated head and they kept staring at me. In a panic, I closed the eyelids and began to realize that I just couldn’t save a dead Jennifer Anniston whose head had been cut off for the last several hours.
I awoke wondering if they’d still make a Friends reunion special.
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