Lost – Season 3 Finale – “Through The Looking Glass”

lost through the looking glass Spoilers Ahead.

I know it has been a long time since I wrote about TV and I am a week late in talking about the Lost season finale, but it was so good and there is a funny story involving the lateness, so here we go.

My wife and I have been diligently watching this season of Lost since it started. Every Wednesday we make sure we are home so we can catch it first thing. Well, this past Wednesday we were invited over to some friend’s house for dinner after church.

The debate began shortly after. In my head, I believed that there was in fact another episode after that week, so it wasn’t finale time, but close to it. We thought about declining the offer and going home to watch Lost. Then we thought about going home to record it and then coming to dinner. Lastly, we knew ABC would be showing the episode on their website and we could watch it there.

Of course, it is rude to decline a dinner invitation for a television show, but we did consider it. But seeing as we had just dropped the China bomb, it felt especially rude. I knew that if I ran home to tape it, I would just wind up staying there as I was tired. Quite tired, actually. I’ve watched episodes online before, and they always worked out well, so we decided on that option.

The dinner was good and the conversation was nice.

It was actually a few days later before we got to watch the episode online. Apparently, there was a pre-episode clip show before the actual finale and this is what we watched online. And I use the term watch loosely, as I wound up fast-forwarding through a lot of it since it all seemed kind of pointless. I don’t need them to recap, as I’ve watched every episode adamantly.

Kind of bummed that this episode was a recap episode, I readied myself with anticipation for the finale on what would be the very evening that I am now typing this.

As I wrote before, I am now at the parent’s house in Oklahoma. Grandchildren roamed freely in the afternoon and I pulled out the TV Guide to check the times for the finale. Folks are in a different time zone you see, and I wanted to make sure I got the timing right for my viewing.

But it wasn’t listed. There was some dumb celebrity reality thing on instead. What the…? Where is my Lost? I checked Thursday and Friday in case it was switched to a new night. Then I went to the website. There was nothing anywhere about the time for the season finale.

I couldn’t figure it out. I went to tvguide.com and looked up Lost. They too didn’t have time for tonight but had an episode guide. The last listing was for last week and it noted that it was the finale.

Crap, how did this happen? I went back to ABC and clicked on their watching format. Ah, there were two episodes listed for Lost that night and the second seemed to be the finale. A quick e-mail to the wife to let her know and then I watched.

As per usual on my TV comments, I shall spoil.

Holy crap! That was awesome.

I gotta say this season has kind of disappointed me. The first section before the break had some great moments, but learning all that stuff about the Others kind of zapped their potency. They were great characters when we knew nothing. Learning about them, and even almost caring for them kind of ruined their venom.

After the break there were moments of brilliance, but also a few downers. I loved the way the new guys were buried alive, but the whole they knew more than we realized seemed kind of pointless as, well, they died.

But this was Lost at its finest. I won’t go into the details of the episode (which you can find on Wikipedia) but will give some impressions.

From the previous episode I was pretty sure Charlie was going to die. Still, it was a very emotional scene and I still felt that jolt of shock. This was especially true since moments before we had the fake murder of Sayid, Jin, and Bernard. While I’m glad they aren’t dead as I love Sayid and Jin, I felt cheated about the fake. There wasn’t enough reason for the Others to not follow the order.

Hurley had such a wonderful moment though, rescuing them with the bus. He has been so unused lately, and it was an obvious setup since nobody wanted him for help, but still a great ovation moment.

Beautiful, momentous scenes in the underwater vessel. Desmond is still my hero.

Locke is my new Gandalf rising from the grave. I still say he is the key to it all.

Lots of death, man. I say “finally.” Some Others needed dying. It never made sense to me that so many were left to live when it seems in reality our Losties would be pissed and murderous a few more times than reality.

Who is on the boat, dudes?

Can’t wait until next season.

Random Shuffle – The Cure, David Grisman And Smokey Robinson

the cure greatest hits

“Just Like Heaven” – The Cure
From Greatest Hits – Acoustic

Does anyone remember the days of scrambled television? Growing up all the cable stations that we weren’t subscribed to (HBO, Showtime, etc.) and all the pay-per-view movies we had not purchased were scrambled in such a way as to make us not want to watch them. The images came out in negatives, and often the picture was split into pieces. The idea, of course, was that no one in their right mind would actually want to watch television in this manner.

The idea was often wrong. I used to watch all manner of programs in this way. I can specifically remember watching the first 48 Hours in this manner. The audio remained good, so I got most of the jokes and could figure out what was going on, and occasionally the image was unbroken enough to actually see what was happening.

There were also, I must admit, a few late-night fumblings watching some adult pay-per-view. You couldn’t see much, but if you squinted right every now and again you might see a negative of a nipple. For a pubescent teenager, this was sometimes enough.

During the early ’90s, when alternative suddenly became a musical buzzword, The Cure did an acoustic pay-per-view special. To say I was a sullen, depressed teenager seems a little beyond the point because aren’t all teenagers sullen and depressed? The Cure, of course, is the poster band for sullen, depressed teenagers the world over. So, of course, I watched the special. And of course, I watched it in the negative, scrambled version.

It was a darn good show, even if Robert Smith looked like some kind of space alien. Come to think of it, maybe I could see him better than I thought.

“Track 02” – David Grisman Quintet
From 04/11/99

Now “Track 02” isn’t actually the name of this song. I’m sure it has an official, proper name, the thing is, no one seems to know it. The majority of Grisman’s songs do not contain lyrics, so you cannot use words to identify the music. Live, the DGQ uses a lot of improvisation and thus the songs don’t necessarily sound like they do on the studio albums.

The show list on etree.org is also silent in terms of song names. This is a database run by thousands (or tens of thousands) of fans that basically has information on every bootleg of every concert ever played in the last hundred years. The fact that no one has updated the show with a single name says a lot.

I once even contacted some of Grisman’s own people asking if they had any setlist information. They replied that they don’t keep track of the songs played, but that if I wanted to send them a copy of the tapes, they’d be happy to identify them for me.

And there we have it – Track 02.

Whatever you want to call it, this is a fine tune. The David Grisman Quintet has been creating its own mix of “Dawg Music” for several decades. It is an odd mix of bluegrass, folk, country, blues, calypso, and Spanish music that comes out in the strangest and most beautiful of ways. There really is no way to describe how it sounds, but it is always worth checking out. Especially that guitarist. Man, he cooks up something exquisite.

smokey robinson

“I Second That Emotion” – Smokey Robinson and the Miracles
From Songs That Inspired The Motown

I attended exactly one semester of graduate school. I moved to Abilene, Texas for such a thing, and while on the drive there I imagined the entire state rising up to sing me Lyle Lovett’s “That’s Right (You’re Not From Texas,)” but mostly nobody noticed my arrival at all. Texans are a strange brew, and that’s all I’ll say about them.

There was a beautiful, kind woman who worked at my apartment office and we became close friends. Initially, I made up small complaints so I could drop by and talk to her, then I gave up all pretense and just started stopping by the office and sitting for a spell.

She’d invite me to dinner, or to help her make popcorn at the local hockey rink, all the while making sure I understood it was nothing but a friendship kick. I didn’t care, it was someone to talk to and I really needed that.

She had a two-year-old son who was just precious. We also became fast friends and would play together for long hours. Once I had to use her facilities, and I could hear him outside saying, “Matchew, Matchew, where are you?” My heart is still broken.

“I Second That Emotion” became a little two-and-a-half-minute piece of ecstasy during this time. It is a song of impenetrable joy. You simply cannot listen to it and not feel happy. I used to write my little apartment friend sticky notes for fun, and one of them read, “‘I Second That Emotion’ makes Mat the happiest.” And it still does.

Plus, it is great fun to agree with someone by saying “I second that emotion.”

Concert Review: Ryan Adams, Paula Cole, Suzanne Vega, Charlie Louvin – Louisville, KY (05/19/07)

After the whole Ryan versus Gillian debacle, I had settled down into a wonderful Ryan Adams groove. I’ve been listening to his music for weeks and generally freaking out about seeing him. My mantra has been “I’m going to see Ryan Adams, I’m going to see Ryan Adams.” The world’s troubles melt away with these words.

We made a day of Louisville, eating some fine food at a Hookah bar, and digging through the record bins at Ear X-Tacy. The doors at the Brown Theatre opened at 6, so we arrived at about 4:30. We weren’t the first. Fanboys and girls abounded.

As a general rule, people tend to annoy me. As a solid, never-bending absolute truth, fanboys piss me off. I get fandom. I get solid adoration of an artist. I simply cannot understand slovenly devotion to a single musician. As we stood in the lobby waiting for the doors we had to stand the asinine fanboy conversations. One boy claimed he would not befriend anyone who was not a Ryan Adams fan. Another made the bold proclamation that the Eagles were better than the Beatles and the Stones, though all three really sucked and Ryan Adams blew them all away.

Someone, please school these boys.

In ways, the fanboys shaped my entire concert experience. We landed a seat in the third row, center, and the hardiest of fanboys were in front of us. I couldn’t help but gauge their reactions and observe their behavior.

Paula Cole started the show. I’ve never much cared for her music, but she carried herself well. The voice wavered from time to time, but the band backed her up sufficiently and it was a good time. After some new songs, and some very awkward talk where she proved herself way too aware of her time out of the spotlight, and the audience’s indifference to her come back she simply nailed “I Don’t Want to Wait.” I had never liked the song before, but it shimmered and glowed on this night.

The fanboys sang along, their faces tinged with irony and scoffing laughter. I may not like Paula, but I respect that she can write her own songs and have the balls to get up and sing them. With feeling.

Next was Charlie Louvin and he tore the roof off. He completely lives up to his legendary status. Even the fanboys were enjoying themselves, even if they were pretending that enjoyment was only in an ironic way.

Even with the irony and a few mocking laughs at his more sentimental songs, Louvin was the consummate professional. He noted that some of the young people might not understand his type of music, but if they listened closely, they just might have a good time anyway. During “Cash on the Barrelhead” he leaned forward inviting one particularly obnoxious fanboy onto the stage to sing along. It was a brilliant moment – embarrassing the fanboy without being vicious or mean, yet still staying within character.

Suzanne Vega was up next and I wondered if most of the audience even knew who she was. She was very much a total professional too. Where Paula Cole seemed too aware of the precariousness of trying to make a comeback in this business, Suzanne let it all roll off her shoulders. She seemed to be saying that she had never left the business, and while the fans may have slipped away, she was always around making her music. Her performance was as unique and quirky as ever. She did a few songs with just her and her bassist and it was beautiful. She closed out with “Luca” and “Tom’s Diner” and the house did seem to remember.

A new NY band, Vietnam hit the next spot. I won’t say they were bad, but they were not what we needed at that point. We were all exhausted and ready for nothing but Ryan Adams. They had their 70’s era Allman Brothers band schtick down pat. Except it wasn’t really schtick, but done completely seriously. It was all rock, no subtlety.

And then he came. Stools were set in a half circle towards the back of the stage. The lights were incredibly dim. Mood I guess. The Cardinals came and then Mr. Adams in a shower cap, hoodie, and dark sunglasses. The recently torn ligament and subsequent cast kept him from playing guitar, but his voice has never sounded better.

He played about half the new album, which hasn’t been released and I didn’t know, but it was all good. The record should be brilliant – kind of subdued and sad, more Heartbreaker than Cold Roses, but genius in the way only Ryan Adams can be.

Throughout everybody’s performances, there was trouble with the monitor speakers. Every performer complained about it and was followed by stagehands running around on stage for a bit. During Ryan’s first song, you could tell it wasn’t fixed for he pointed at the speaker then his finger went into the air dozens of times. By the second song, he had called a stagehand over to chew him out.

“Please don’t piss Ryan off,” Holly begged, for Ryan Adams is a bit notorious for walking off the stage early when he gets pissed. Pissed or not, the performance was magic.

The dim lights turned from blue to red and the shower cap came off. They played an Alice in Chains cover, “Down in a Hole” that turned the auditorium inside out. Just as I began to think this might be the most amazing concert experience of my life Ryan let out a “Thanks” and took off.

Twenty minutes and he’s gone.

Bastard. Son of a monkey. Words I cannot write for my mother might read.

Man, I know you have to keep up your eccentricities. I know it is part of your allure to pull this crap. But it is called being a professional. Did Charlie Louvin walk off because he couldn’t hear himself? Did Paula Cole or Suzane Vega? Man, the Vietnam guitarist just moved over to the one working monitor. We paid good money, drove long distances, and generally did what we could to see you perform. You should at least do your freaking job.

Much cursing ensued during the drive home. But then a fanboy posted videos, and I watched, I listened, I teared up just a little, and I have to say, I forgave.

“Goodnight Rose” – Forgive the lousy video quality, as I said the lighting was terribly dim. But the audio is good.

“Rip Off”

Ryan Adams Versus Gillian Welch

I’ve been putting off telling this story, but as we’re very close to time, and new horrors have occurred, the time to tell is now.

So, a few months back I realized that the lovely, wonderful Gillian Welch was coming to the Ryman in Nashville. This particular performance was in support of the always-interesting Connor Oberst and whatever supporting people he’s calling Bright Eyes. I’m generally a fan of the Bright Eyes and dig the idea of catching them live, but let’s be honest here, it was Gillian at the Ryman. I was so there.

Me, the wife, and my newfound friend Holly procured tickets faster than you can say, “Slap me silly with a ping-pong table.”

Those who know me know my undying love for the lovely, wonderful Gillian Welch and that I have unfortunately missed her last two performances in Bloomington. My soul weeps to this very day due to this fact. I swore a blood oath that I would never miss another Gillian Welch concert. I’d gouge out my eyes rather than do such a thing.

Fast forward a few weeks and I get an e-mail from the good people at the Kentucky Center in Louisville of upcoming events. Turns out a local radio station is doing a listener appreciation thing with Charlie Louvin, Suzanne Vega, Paula Cole, and Ryan freaking Adams. Tickets are $20.

I don’t think, I don’t breathe, I call and purchase three tickets. I anticipate the excitement from Holly who will totally freak out and worship me for days.

As the ticket seller is wrapping up, I get a funny feeling in my belly. The show date is May 19, which suddenly sounds familiar. When are we to see Gillian at the Ryman?

May 19.

No. Freaking. Way.

I have now just purchased tickets (ahem, three tickets) to see Ryan Adams in Louisville on the same date I have tickets to see Gillian in Nashville.

The wife is called in, and the phone is called to Holly. We all cry out.

After days and weeks, we finally decide to see Ryan. Frankly, I was outnumbered, but the consolidation was that Gillian lives in Nashville. Holly lives in Nashville. We’ll catch her some other time.

I’m sorry Gillian. Truly, truly I am. The eyes are being gouged this very second.

Breathe. Feel bad for a moment. Stop listening to Gillian and throw in a little Heartbreaker followed by Gold followed by Cold Roses.

Ryan Adams, here we come!

An interesting, heartbreaking addendum just occurred to this story. Holly sends me an e-mail explaining that the White Stripes will be playing a fairly limited (though she can get tickets) show in Nashville the Friday before Gillian/Bright Eyes/Ryan.

I know it’s you, Gillian, teaching me a lesson. I have learned. Please forgive.

Another heartbreaking newsflash just happened. Ryan has apparently hurt his arm and cannot play guitar for our show. Gillian, I said I had learned, please stop tormenting me!

Dreamin’ Songs – “Damn, Sam (I Love A Woman That Rains)” by Ryan Adams

You really shouldn’t expect more out of me this week than Ryan Adams, Ryan Adams, Ryan Adams. My excitement, while not yet peaking, is reaching all-new heights. I’ve also been listening to him pretty much non-stop for the last week, which explains why he is serving up Dreamin’ Songs twice in a row.

There actually was a non-Ryan song in my head when I first woke up this morning, but instead of waking and writing it down, I drifted back to sleep, and when I awoke a second time this song was stuck in my head.

“Damn Sam” is off of Heartbreaker, which is sometimes my favorite Ryan Adams record (when it isn’t relinquishing its throne to Cold Roses or the unreleased Destroyer.) It is also his most, well, heartbreaking. I simply can’t listen to most of those songs without drowning in a depressed stupor. And this particular song constantly sees me in a puddle of tears.

The thing about it this morning is that I couldn’t remember the opening line. I kept singing, “As a man, I ain’t never been much for….” and I couldn’t remember the rest. I got the follow-up line, “I’m as calm as a fruit stand in New York and maybe as strange,” but that first one kept ending in question marks.

I kept adding in words that might make sense: “picking up dames?” or “lying lame?” I knew it had to rhyme somewhat with “strange,” but that doesn’t leave a lot of options. It tormented me out of bed, into the shower, and through breakfast. Finally moments ago, after finally leaving it alone for a bit, it came during laundry. “as a man, I ain’t never been much for sunny days.”

Ah, that makes tons of sense, since Ryan is kind of a dark dude, and this song is all about his manic obsession with the rain. Seriously the guy throws in a line about the rain at least once an album. He’s the John Cusack of the songwriting business.

Dreamin’ Songs – “Tennessee Sucks” – Ryan Adams

Amazingly, I have not yet mentioned the Ryan Adams/Gillian Welch decision around these parts. I shall surely do my best to discuss that very thing soon. For now, I shall only say that I’m going to see Ryan Adams in less than two weeks.

Because of this, I have been listening to my Ryan Adams records with great dedication. The queer thing is that despite my obsession with Mr. Adams, there are a few records that I have not listened to very often.

The full blame goes to my bootleg collection. I have quite a large stack of bootlegs, and I have a tendency to go for those rather, than the studio albums – with the exception of Gold, Heartbreaker, Cold Roses, Jacksonville City Lights, and occasionally Love Is Hell. That’s a big exception, I know and for the record, the records that have not received a lot of spins are – Demolition, 29, and Rock N Roll.

With the newfound studio dedication, these less-loved albums have received my full attention. I am learning to really love Demolition and 29 is growing on me, though I don’t know if I’ll ever much care for Rock N Roll.

All of this brings me to “Tennessee Sucks,” which is off of Demolition. The album as a whole has continued to grow on me with repeated listens. Where, at first, I found it too soft and depressing, I have learned to appreciate its simple melodies and poetic lyricism. This song is a good example of that with its pretty piano emphasis and it’s the refrain of “Tennessee sucks in the summer/what have you got that can put us under?” Which gets bonus points for mentioning one of my favorite states, and nails a certain teenage feeling I often receive.

The Listening Room: Garth Brooks – “Shameless”

Yeah, I know, Garth freaking Brooks. But I grew up in Oklahoma, which is pretty, much ground zero for Garth Brooks. Every time I go back home my mom tells me about another time she saw Garth eating a sandwich at Burger King or wherever.

I was mostly a metalhead in high school, but the behemoth that is Garth Brooks still kind of got to me. I can remember sitting up in my little attic bedroom late at night, listening to this album really low. Say what you will, but this Billy Joel cover has a mountain of energy and just the right amount of cheezy swagger that still bowls me over.

In my continuing effort to put every piece of music I own on my iPod, I went through my Garth Brooks box set (yes, I have a Garth Brooks box set, it was cheap and you’ll get over it.) I gotta say I went all nostalgic with it and had a few listens and might have dropped a tear or two in my beer.

Be sure to check out what the rest of Blogcritics has in their players.(sorry the blogcritics link no longer works)

Cinderella (2006)

cinderella poster

For as far back as I can remember I have loved horror movies. Growing up in the 80s I can remember begging my mother to let me see the slasher films of Freddie Kreuger, Jason, and Michael Myers. Mostly she said no, but I still managed to catch them on late-night cable TV. Later the voyeuristic, sick pleasures of real death films like Faces of Death became something of an underground scene at my school. In the decades since that time, I have continued in my love for horror and gore.

The slasher film seemed to go out of style sometime in the early 90s but came back in vogue a few years later with Scream and its winking, ironic sensibilities. Now we’ve got Asian horror and its significant lack of naked breasts but with plenty of extreme violence. This brings us to Cinderella.

I’m not exactly sure why this film is called Cinderella as there is nary a Prince Charming, a mouse, nor a pumpkin carriage to be found, but there is enough dark moodiness to have Cinderella and her stepsisters screaming for mercy.

The story revolves around Hyun-soo (Shin Se-Kyung) and her mother, Yoon-hee (Do Ji-Won), a plastic surgeon. Dear old Dr. Mom performs facelifts for all of Hyun-soo’s friends who are obsessed with ul-jjang (the ideal beauty), but before long things start going horribly wrong. The face-lifted friends begin having weird visions of their faces being clawed off, which leads them to do some pretty nasty stuff to themselves.

Hyun-soo also begins having visions that her face is a horrible wreck, and she hears voices claiming her own face is someone else’s.

The film is loaded with mood. Shadows abound, and unknown dark faces linger just out of focus in the background. Voices whisper strange and haunting things throughout. As an audience, we’re never quite sure what is going on at any time, but we can be pretty sure it’s eerie.

There are a few Asian horror movie clichés, and to be sure you see more than a few long black-haired girls creeping along. In the end, it feels more like a Romantic era melodrama than a horror film, but for what it lacks in originality and gore it makes up for in mood and social commentary.

Yeah, that’s right, I said social commentary. The film has a great deal to say about our perception of beauty and the extremes we will go through to achieve them. Hyun-soo and her friends, who have all undergone some form of cosmetic surgery, are young students. They haven’t really formed concrete personalities but are more than willing to change their appearance surgically to gain some warped sense of beauty.

In one chilling scene, two girls begin slicing their faces open with sculpting knives all the while whispering “I’ll make you pretty.” This mantra is repeated throughout the film. All anyone seems to care about is his or her physical beauty, and they are willing to do just about anything to achieve it. Take a quick look at our own magazines and television commercials it’s not hard to see how such a warped perception could easily be believed.

Unfortunately in its attempts to be a horror film, a melodrama, and a social commentary, the film falls a little short in all categories. It is stretched just a little too thin to be completely satisfying as any of them, yet it provides enough of each to make it well worth watching.

Slaughter Night (SL8N8) (2006)

slaughter night postert

The concept of adding critical blurbs to a movie poster, or DVD case is fascinating to me. PR people are able to take heated, loathing, and scathing reviews, pluck out one or two words (out of context), and make the worst movie sound like the greatest thing to ever hit the cinemas.

It was with this thought in my mind that I came to Slaughter Night, a movie so glorious that the only blurb they could find for its DVD cover is “A Whole Lot of Gore.” That’s it. Nothing about how amazing the director is, or how the story is new, fresh, or superb.

Gore. A whole lot of gore. I knew I was in for a treat then.

Hoping that maybe it was mainstream cinema that was finding this little Dutch slasher film a touch too nasty, I went to IMBD in search of fan-boy reviews. The summaries there were a little better. No one was raving about it, but the opinion was that the slashing was good and the story above par.

I should have listened to the cover.

Slaughter Night starts out with a bang. We’re treated to a flashback where some unseen psycho-killer has several kids trapped in an old house. Outside we see what must be police officers sneaking up to the house to save the day. But the killer continues on and before the kids can be rescued he slices off their heads and puts them on pikes. Save but one. Not exactly something to watch with Mom, but a pretty exciting way to start a horror flick.

Flash forward and we find Kristel (Victoria Koblenko)arguing with her father about dropping out of school to travel the world. Father figures she’s a smart kid and ought to stick it out, but before we can conclude the argument we’re treated to a pretty harrowing accident that made me think this was one of those new, terrible car commercials.

Kristel and her gang travel to Belgium to pick up a few of her father’s things. Seems he was working on a book that involved a local mining operation. He was especially interested in Andries Martiens (Robert Eleveld), the killer from the beginning of the flick. You see back in olden times, psycho-killers were given the opportunity to free themselves by taking on insanely dangerous missions underground. They were to detect explosive gasses in the mines, ignite them, and if they survived the explosion they were free to go. Apparently, Martiens was given such a deal, and it ended poorly. Dead underground, he now supposedly haunts the abandoned mines. At least this is what the mine tour guides like to say to scare the tourists with.

Of course, being a horror movie, the ghost is real, and he’s mad as hell.

Of course, our heroes take a tour underground.

Of course, bad things happen.

Slaughter Night is pretty by the books in terms of plot. From the opening murder, we know that baddie is going to be back. Once the cave comes into view, we know our characters are going down, and most of them will be whacked. In the end, we know the killer will be killed. That’s not even a spoiler for this type of film. In slasher films, the plot is usually irrelevant anyway. It’s the style that counts.

While Slaughter Night tries to give us plenty of style, it mostly falls flat. During the scary scenes, the director uses hand-held cameras that shake and move all over the place. This type of shaky cam seems to be in vogue these days with nearly everyone using it to create “mood.” Sometimes it’s effective as in films like Saving Private Ryan or United 93. Here it just distracts. It is especially annoying because the camera shakes violently during the death scenes, obscuring most of the gore. And what’s the point of watching a slasher flick if you can’t see all the slashing?

The lighting is also so murky you can hardly see the characters. Yes, it is in a cave so it should be dark. Yes, darkness can often be used to great effect in a horror film. But instead of adding tension and excitement to the film, it only caused me to be confused as to what was going on.

It’s not all bad. There are a couple of interesting murders (one involving partial decapitation by a shovel that’s pretty cool) and there are one or two scenes that made me jump and squirm.

I was happy to see the Dutch venturing into slasher territory. I’d even be excited to see another one, even if this one failed to ignite my fan-boy sensibilities. Gore-hounds and horror fanatics will find some interesting violence in this film, anybody else should stick with the Descent for their scary movie-in-a-cave fix.

Suspiria (1977)

suspiria poster

Editors Note: I feel it necessary that I originally wrote this in April of 2007. That was nearly 16 years ago. I have seen Suspiria many times since then and my opinion of it has only grown.  I mostly stand by this review, though the writing makes me cringe a little (and I don’t think the acting in most of Argento’s films are bad, don’t know where that thought came from).  But I haven’t changed a word.

Petit and pretty Suzy Banyon flies from New York to Germany to attend a prestigious dance school. The night is dark, mysterious, and lonely, and it is storming with great torrents of rain. Upon arriving at the school, she finds the door locked, and the woman on the intercom refuses to let her inside.

Soon another woman comes to the door, not to allow entrance, but to flee. She looks greatly frightened, and shouts something to unknown persons behind the door, then runs out into the night and rain.

Shortly thereafter, we see a brutal, bloody, completely awesome murder at the school, complete with a knife stabbing directly into a heart, via an open chest, and the coolest hanging this side of The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly.

When Suzy returns the next day she finds everyone distraught over the murder, but much more welcoming than the previous night. She meets the rest of the dancers, and things begin to settle into normalcy. For a moment anyway.

On her first day of class, Suzy falls ill and is forced to become nearly bedridden and given a very special diet. Strange footsteps are heard outside her door every night, maggots fall from the ceiling, bats fly in through the window and more murders pile up. Is there a mass murderer on the loose, or is it something more sinister, more mystical?

The film is beautifully shot, with the lighting causing all sorts of creepy shadows while being bathed in primary colors. Mostly red.

Lots and lots of red.

The score, by the group Goblin, is full of creep and circumstance and sets an eerie mood throughout.

Unlike a lot of Dario Argento films, the acting here is pretty good. All of the leads do a fine job of conveying the right amounts of suspense and dread, or menace and evil, depending on what their characters call for. The plot is pretty thin, as it jumps about quite a bit. Despite what the tagline says, the last 12 minutes veer well into the ludicrous instead of terrifying, but for what the film lacks in these details it absolutely nails in terms of setting a mood and atmosphere.